Cross-dressing can be a fetish but there is a portion of cross-dressers who prefer to call it a lifestyle. So if you meet a man who likes to cross-dress, you’ll need to ask how deep his interest is before you know how to proceed.
- A fetishist likes to cross-dress for the sexual aspect. They get turned on by it in the moment but don’t incorporate it into their daily lives.
- A lifestyler includes cross-dressing into their near-daily life, perhaps something under their street clothes or when they get home from work. It isn’t entirely sexual, it’s about comfort.
- Transvestites, transgender, or drag queens are not covered in this blog because if you’re getting involved with one, you usually know what you’re getting into.
Traditionally, cross-dressers are heterosexual persons who enjoy wearing clothing generally associated with the opposite gender. So if you find that your partner is into cross-dressing, don’t panic – start a dialogue asking for the basic information (who, what, why, when, where, how) and do your best to understand your partner’s point of view. Then you need to decide if it’s something you can live with.
If you can live with it, set down some rules about when it may happen, wardrobe acquisitions (i.e., nothing can be acquired from your closet), budget considerations, etc. If you grow to enjoy it, you may even want to take him shopping but don’t worry if you never get to that point.
If it isn’t something you can live with, be honest with each other.