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How to host a sleepover

He’s coming to your place for a sleepover.  If he’s not a booty call then there are probably a million things racing through your head.  The first should be don’t panic.  Here’s a quick to-do list for the night:

  1. Clean your place.  It’s better to clean the whole thing so that you don’t look like you’re trying to hide a body when his hand is on your closet door and you scream, “Don’t look in there!”  If you can’t clean the entire place, do a surface clean in your kitchen and bathroom, tidy up the living room and at least put clean sheets on your bed (you want it to look inviting, not like he’s the second or third guy whose been there this week).
  2. Put away your personal stuff.  Don’t have a diary hanging out on nightstand for him to peruse when you’re taking your morning shower.  Ditch the collection of pictures of you with your exes.  You may be getting intimate but he doesn’t need to know everything about you just yet.
  3. Buy groceries.  At least have enough for toast and coffee in the morning.  You don’t want him to think that you’re squatting in an abandoned building.
  4. Buy condoms.  Never assume he’s bringing them.  Buy a nice container with lid for your nightstand and put them inside.  (If you’re a practical joker, buy one box of regular size and one box of jumbo.  Then open the jumbo box and take a few out while leaving the regular sized box intact.  When the moment comes, present him with both boxes.)
  5. Get yourself ready.  Shower, shave, paint but do not put on a lot of makeup (you’ll look rough in the morning) or a ton of scented products (they taste bad – really).
  6. Leave the shapewear in the drawer.  There is nothing sexy about grunting while trying to remove your panties.
  7. Be prepared to laugh off the little mishaps.  This isn’t going to be perfect.  In fact, you might want to invest in a first aid kit. (nudge nudge wink wink)
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One response to “How to host a sleepover

  1. Pingback: How to booty call a guy | Girl, don't be stupid!

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