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How to communicate to a man

Please note:  This blog is entitled How to communicate to a man, not How to communicate with a man.  This blog is not intended to facilitate a conversation with a man, it’s how to communicate important information to them.

  1. Write down everything you want to say to him.
  2. Separate what you’ve written into categories.
  3. Pick one category.  Don’t give him more than one thing to concentrate on at a time.
  4. Remove all unnecessary words, emotions, name-calling, etc.
  5. Give one introductory sentence.
  6. Bullet-point it.  Aim for less than 3 bullet points.
  7. Highlight the action words because these will be what’s important to him.
  8. If you’re giving him a problem, give him a solution or a graceful exit.
  9. Condense it, again.
  10. Now communicate it to him.

Example:  You know sweetheart, it really drives me insane when you’re not taking part in the household chores.  I work really hard to make a nice home and when you’re not doing stuff like taking out the trash, I feel like you don’t care and why do I bother to do half the stuff that I do do.  Another thing I hate is when you don’t call me when you’re coming home late because maybe I have something planned and you’re totally screwing with my plans.  I think it sucks and it’s inconsiderate.  When you do that, I try really hard not to just reach over and punch you in the face because I’m trying so hard to be vulnerable with you and it’s like you don’t even care.  And why don’t you ever defend me to your mother?  Seriously?  Have some balls already.

Reformed example:  I need to ask you to help out more around the house.  1.  Please take out the trash every night.  2.  Please call when you’re coming home late.  Okay?  Good chat!


2 responses to “How to communicate to a man

  1. Liza

    I love your example and reformed example. Sadly, even if the message is heard, it may still not be acted upon. That’s a different problem/challenge. Step 1: get the message heard.

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