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This is going to be brutal

Talking about change is great but are you sure you know what needs to change?  Inhabiting your life can make one myopic when it comes to how they’re truly perceived.  Be honest, haven’t you ever had the experience where a friend makes an off-hand comment and you think, “Where the heck did that come from?  Do I really come off like that?”  The truth is….you might.  Outsiders have a unique perspective on us that we’ll never be able to experience unless we ask.

Say what?

Yes, ask them.  Gather up a few trusted friends, perhaps siblings (perhaps not – depending on your relationship with them) and ask them what your shortcomings are.  Ask them to be brutally honest.  Now they’re probably going to hem and haw and try to get out of answering.  They care about you.  They don’t want to offend you.  You will need to promise them that you won’t get upset or harbor resentment against them.  Reassure them know that you just want to improve who you are and their input will be invaluable.  Be sensitive to the fact that it may be easier for people to give you their opinion in writing rather than face to face.

When you do receive their suggestions, compile a list and see where the similarities are – those are probably the things that you need to work on most.

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